Wednesday, January 31, 2007
So i've decided to change church. Reason being i just cant take anymore of those distractions in church. all i want is a new beginning and a place where its just me and God. yeaps. Gonna leave in 2 weeks time. lets just have 1 more week in church. Just dun want to release my anger in church and become a problem to people. might as well remove myself before i become a problem.
Watched apocalypto. Its sick. totally sick. makes u appreciate life in the city. How those african tribes kill people just for offerings. But i guess even in the city. There will be the same kind of killing everywhere. some die under swords. some under guns. makes me wonder how i will die. but i guess i would like a death thats quick and painless. i was thinking having my head chopped off. aahh. thats quick and painless. that would be the biggest blessing to me. haha. having a quick and painless one and going to heaven to enjoy life there. oh well. But i guess how i die will still be in the hands of God. haha. I might not even have to die!! armageddon might come when i am still alive. haha. that would even be better. haha.
What goes around comes around Nathan. I will fight with you till the end. I will conquer Nathan when i die.
4:23 PM
Monday, January 29, 2007
I guess i couldnt care less anymore. I shud just stop being bothered by what is going on in church and how some people try flirting with girls in church. This feeling of hatred is still growing strong inside i guess. But all i ask is that it wun be let out like 2 years ago. I guess its their own life and free to do what they want. If i realli had a choice. I'd leave this church and go for a better one. A church where i can just concentrate on God instead of having distractions by some people in church. I dun mind leaving this church and the people i call brothers. I just dun wan anymore conflicts and i just want to stop seeing things i hate to see most. I couldnt care less about anything being a student leader. i couldnt care less about the leaders in my church. They can go rambling about their leadership roles but as long as the dun step within my line.
1:29 PM
Wednesday, January 24, 2007
so i went out wit kai today t fix his dumb com which have been down for months according to him. Something like dat. haha. found out what Vicky was doing and still the same. working at that dumb company. why work for a company that drags your pay for nuts sake??!! its just what people would do for money. pathetic. Have you ever been on the bus and wonder how mani christians there are out there walking among our midst w/o us knowing? its just how God works silently in great ways.
11:28 PM
Tuesday, January 23, 2007
New skin up and new entry in!! haha. Just seems that blogs nowadays have becomed quite stagnant. Considering the fact that everyone is in school studying and busy doing work. and how i laugh at this people going hustle and bustle at this time. slacking was never this good. I have never ever slacked so much b4. considering that i slacked 4 years of my secondary school life. Its just everyday i go out with my frens and i see my old school mates coming back home from school. its a great feeling. it truely is.
My time on this world won't be long. It won't be long and i'm aware of it. The moment when everything around me dissappears. I guess i could'nt care less what happens to me few years down the road. 3 years? 10 years? i have no idea how long i am left with. But i guess life isn't abt how long u live. Its about how you live. Everyday i beg God just to let me slack happily for my last few weeks b4 i start working again. Would you allow me to God?
I dunno how people view me as. Am i a nice guy to them? am i irritating? haha. I guess i couldnt ask more. I am not sure what type of person i am. But i guess my only request b4 everything ends is that people remember me as a nice guy and someone loving. at least to one person. at least. I guess its time for me to start my duties as a son to my parents and honour them.
11:47 PM
Monday, January 15, 2007
somehow its just amazing how someone can slack during a long break. and even though i got nothing to do during my wait for my results, im enjoying every single moment of it. i got no money though. haha. somehow now i see people suffering from love and bgr problems. i am constantly reminded of the consequences of going into a relationship. My little sister once asked me why do we have to suffer heart breaks when we break off with our bf's or gf's. i couldnt explain much to her but here is my full answer. this thing of suffering heart breaks i guess its totalli fair. it took me long to realise this though. Its so that we will be reminded of the pain and stop us from repeating the same mistake. lets just put it this way. If after a break up, u feel no pain no heart break, won't u keep repeating the same mistake again? its a reasonable thing though. haha. somehow in life its pretty interesting to talk to some christians and their experiences in life. My cousin's boyfriend told me that leadership roles is like jumping off a plane with a parachute. the most scariest part is not the first time, but rather the second time. its only during the second part that u know what will happen that gives us a reason to keep resisting leadership roles. i guess my sister is right. leadership roles suck totally. I am pretty aware some people do it for the pride. But when it comes down to it. Its not much of a pride thing anymore. I was just slacking one day doing nothing on my bed when a voice in my head told me a quote that is so true. Fun isn't it? u do nothing and u talk to a voice in ur head. keeps me occupied all the time. i will just end this entry with this short quote. Quote: Why are you letting something as common as pride stop you from doing extraordinary things?
3:47 PM
Friday, January 05, 2007
someone once told me if the world were a perfect place and people were equalli nice. He wouldnt know who are his true frens. I reflected this fact and i guess its totalli true. 3 cheers to the rotten people out there. i knew my true frens bcoz of u people. Went to catch movie wit Kristy, Ki hui and Zi jing ystd. not bad i must say. yes its death note 2 if u r wondering. haha. after movie went to long john and started to make fun of people and laughing our heads off. So i went home and as i was waiting at the bus stop. I sat beside this group of malay aunties. And they were gossiping and laughing at people. Jus like us i guess. ANd yes i understood every single word of malay they were talking about. So this aunty took the same bus as me. she was laughing loudly when she entered the bus and *BOOM*. She fell. being the cold blooded person i am. i juz stood behind her and looked and waited for her to stand up and go up the bus. and yes she is not disabled. she is walking perfectli fine. so she kept laughing even after she stood up. Went to the back seat behind which i was at also. She jus kept laughing and after a while. she started crying. stunned i was but decided to ignore her. i have no bloody idea why she cried and i have no idea why i am writing this either. SO on to the next topic.
Went back to school today t collect my good progress award. saw lots of my old frens and had a chat wit some of em. heard soem things about the new principal. Weird i must say. but didnt get to see him. oh well. ANd i realised most of the sec 1 girls are ah lians and amazed i muz say. Its either the weather is getting hotter that they muz have shorter skirts or its jus for fun. But i guess the person i wanted to see most is Klinton and AINI and Fizah. Saw Klinton. But not Aini and Fizah!! WHERE YOU 2 GO!!???grr. oh well.
HAve you heard of a phrase? this phrase is currentli running my life. "master of my own emotions". So yeah. u knw abt it now. This phrase is the biggest reason why i gave up the role of student leader. Until i become the master of my own emotions i wun lead anyone. This phrase was introduced to me by and old friend 3 years ago but i juz ignored. But its onli until today i am starting to use it. 3 years went by so fast. Even people pass by my life. damn i miss some people. This phrase is written on this blog for a reason.
3:01 PM
