Tuesday, February 20, 2007
Somehow i talked to my mum as i remembered and i guess i have to admit that we are not rich people. all the spending of money in my past sure has gone to my head that money is infinite for my family. UNtil i realised how hard my parents have to slave for hours just to get us another meal. Its heartbreaking i guess. It truly broke my heart. i guess i have been utterly selfish for the past 16 years of my life. This new year all i can do for them is just to save my money. Seeing my dad collect back all our ang bao money, this year i felt something new and different. something warm but yet heartbreaking at the same time. we have no money. That is the reason why my dad had to take back all our money. i couldnt understand that for the past 16 years bcoz i was ignorant of it. i guess all i can do for them is to return all the ang baos happily hoping my dad wouldnt lose any money. But i guess we did. my dad lost lots of money. i guess i will just have to postpone my ideas on having a new handphone and laptop. and just save in any way i could. well. I am sure God will still provide for our family in a sufficient way and i trust that he will do it. I stood at my window last night at 3am and i asked him why i had to be poor. he didnt give me a direct answer. All he said was that with every dollar i lack on earth, i gain a million dollars in heaven. haha. its was then i realised how rich i truly am in heaven. and i still have more to collect. SO all you chinese out there. in the midst of all the ang bao collecting. Dun forget to keep yearning for spiritual "ang baos" that God is waiting to bless us with ya? I'd rather be rich in heaven than on earth.
10:09 PM
